Meet the newest member of the Jesus family

Throughout the years, we’ve had more than our fair share of variations of Jesus Christ: Raptor Jesus, Piss Christ, Potato Chip Jesus, Black Jesus and so forth. Now, get ready to meet the newest version of God’s only begotten son.

We present to you: Taco Christo.

Taco Christo was found in a breakfast taco in Beeville, Texas. Taco Christo is made of a delicious hand made flour tortilla and his compatriots, bacon and egg, demonstrating what a real holy trinity is. Anna Rodriguez, director of the adult daycare where his bread-based lord and savior was found, says:

“We believe God works in mysterious ways.”

We don’t know about mysterious ways, but God clearly works in delicious ways.

Sacré poo!

Warrior Readers, The Guys have done you a disservice all these years. We’ve warned you about animals, aliens, robots and education, but we overlooked one of the gravest threats to humanity: the humanities. Namely: art.

We’re not sure how we missed it. Maybe it’s because those artist types are so non-threatening with their berets and soul patches. But, make no mistake: given the chance, an artist will submerge your family, friends and divine creator into his own urine.

Fortunately, the French have shown us how to fight back. They have seen Andres Serrano’s Piss Christ and–in response–gotten more done in mere days than what U.S. Republicans have attempted for the past 22 years.