Here’s a penis so big you can see it from space

This has been a particularly rough week, which in 2018 is really saying something. So let’s end it with a dick joke, shall we?

In Australia, because of course that’s where this happened, someone drew a huge penis and testicles in the sand of a dry lake bed. How do we know this? Because it’s on Google Maps. At this point, Google has to know about it, but they haven’t done anything about it. It’s still up there. Free and in the breeze.

Thank you, prankster. Let’s see if there are any more wangs around the world.

I’ll just wear those home

Have you ever gone shopping, only to realize that you forgot that one item, that key component, that very thing you needed?

Yeah, so, some people have that problem worse than you.

A male Japanese Air Force Major decided to do some shopping after leaving a late-night farewell party for one of his colleagues. One can make the logical assumption that he was drunk, because he then proceeded to ide behind a convenience store to strip off his clothes before entering. Oh wait-it gets better.

Once inside, totally naked, our Major set out to purchase panties and pantyhose.

His Emperor’s New Clothes incident was only witnessed by the store’s clerk (also the only person in the store other than Private Partyman), who quickly called the cops after the officer left the store. Major Boner has been suspended from his duties for 10 days, and papers were filed for indecent exposure. Insert lame joke about legal briefs here.