Trump: Man of 140 characters (or less)

Follow @realDonaldTrump for all the news that nobody objective with a conscience will print without questioning it.

Part of The Guys’ preparation for President-elect Trump’s inauguration this week is to cancel our newspaper subscriptions. Why pay for a service that the next president won’t talk to when we can read his deepest, most planned out thoughts for free on Twitter? It’s the very least that we, his soon-to-be constituents can do since he doesn’t even like tweeting, you guys.

According to his own words (if they can be trusted) during a Fox News interview with Ainsley Earhardt on Wednesday, Trump has to call out Alec Baldwin, SNL, his replacement on The Apprentice, our free press and our Intelligence Community on Twitter, starting at sometimes the crack of dawn through late at night, because he has no choice! This is a service he provides for you, citizen — so start appreciating it with likes, retweets and #followbacks!

Oh, and also because nobody will quote him without distorting it with cheap media tricks like adding context or republishing his words verbatim:

‘Look, I don’t like tweeting. I have other things I could be doing,’ Trump told Earhardt. ‘But I get very dishonest media, very dishonest press, and it’s my only way that I can get out and correct.’

… he said to Fox News. Looks like even a corrupt clock with tiny hands can be right at least once a day.

Take it from Snee: Your generation sucks

Oh, Internet news sites. You’ve let me down again.

Look, I don’t expect too much out of you, CNN, MSNBC, Fox News and et al. I get it: you don’t really understand how the Internet already shares common knowledge through Snopes and Fark.

But, somebody on news editing staffs must know that prejudice and pseudoscience are not newsworthy, no matter who it’s about. They know this, yet they give the go-ahead to articles like the Associated Press’s January 11th inauguration filler, “With Obama, many say bye-bye to the boomer generation.” Continue reading Take it from Snee: Your generation sucks

Tired-looking Clinton scolds sexist press

Looking a little time-worn and shrewish, former First Lady and current Senator and presidential contender Hillary Clinton nagged The Washington Post about sexist press coverage in this election.

“It does seem as though the press at least is not as bothered by the incredible vitriol that has been engendered by the comments by people who are nothing but misogynists,” said Mrs. Clinton, who could use a touch of anti-aging cream and perhaps a push-up bra.

Mrs. Clinton went on to say something about her feelings, but this blog was distracted by some sports announcement. She also probably yaked the reporter’s ear off about family ailments and what her daughter’s been up to.

She did not cite any specific examples, just some intuition she had that people don’t like women. There’s no word whether Mrs. Clinton will release any of the facts gathered by male employees in her campaign.

People get older over time (including children)

With the May releases of blockbusters trickling out, it’s obvious that it is now summer. (Hear that sound? It’s children on your lawn! Remember: shoot first, then drag them onto your porch.)

With summer here, it’s also time for the press to go on vacation while entertaining their interns with puppet shows, magic tricks and lists. The most popular list, of course, is the “Child Stars: Then and Now” rehash that gets updated every year.

Today’s lazy adventure in Internet slide shows comes to you courtesy of Florida’s

Bonus Fun Fact:
Apparently Prince William was a child star.