Beavers knock out power in Canada

Every now and then we hear about a small animal, usually a squirrel, getting into someplace it shouldn’t be and knocking out the power to an area. The animal terrorists have stepped up their efforts, and now Canada is in a state of panic.

Last weekend, citizens of Prince Albert, Saskatchewan lost power when a group of beavers chewed through a wooden power pole. Luckily, power was restored after an hour, because Canadian power companies are prepared for Canadian power interruptions. This is the first beaver-led coordinated attack on infrastructure that this blog is aware of.

In truth, we just wanted to see if we could write a post about a beaver in Prince Albert without snickering. We failed horribly.

Take it from Snee: The King’s Naughty Speech

The Oscar nominations were announced this week, which means it’s time for the average American to pretend to care about non-explodey movies.

The one film that most people will lie about seeing when writing their “Top 2010 Movies” lists is The King’s Speech. Let’s not kid ourselves: it’s about a British king, but not one that fights battles alongside talking animals. This movie wasn’t made; it was grown in a lab to take up space in your Netflix cue.

But Miramax head, Harvey Weinstein (whose last name can’t decide how to pronounce “-ein”), has a plan: editing out the swearing to bump it down to a PG-13 or PG rating. This makes sense because the movie has seriously been hurt by the lack of grade schoolers asking their parents, “Who’s Winston Churchill?” in a crowded theater.

What might such a movie sound like, long before it reaches even basic cable? Read on for Harry, England and St. George! Continue reading Take it from Snee: The King’s Naughty Speech

Top that, SeriouslyReaders!

The next time you play “Truth or Dare,” know that there is no way kissing another dude or wearing a diaper through the drive-thru will ever top this.

A naked woman stole a car at 5 am from a guy posting business signs on the side of the highway. Because turnaround is fair play, that guy stole her car.

The guy and the police chased her until she crashed his car into a gate. The police pursued her on foot, but couldn’t grab her because she was too slippery from sweat and blood. She literally slipped through their fingers and stole a cop car.

She crashed that car into a highway berm and sustained flight for 50 feet.

She then ran on foot again, and scaled a barb wire fence before the cops finally tazed her. (And here we thought they pulled those out at the drop of a candy wrapper.)

In other “Truth or Dare” news:
Monaco’s royal family has named at least two princes Albert.