Thank god it wasn’t a sex scandal

The Guys prepared for the worst when we heard the longtime White House correspondent Helen Thomas retired in an uproar. Fortunately, there is no sex tape, just some anti-Semitism.

In a Youtube video last week, Thomas suggested that Israelis should “get the hell out of Palestine,” and “go home” to “Poland, Germany … and America and everywhere else.”

Of course, the big issue for the other correspondents is her prime front row seat in the White House press room. Sides are already being staked out as the news reporters are suggesting that the seat isn’t appropriate for opinion writers.

See? It’s just like if you were forced to resign from your job for taking an nonobjective side in the Israeli-Palestinian conflict.

And coming up at five: a need for a new partner

A Las Vegas television news reporter was fired from his job because he and his girlfriend went on Craigslist looking for another dude to join them in the bedroom. Wait a second, it’s Las Vegas–isn’t that what you usually have to do to get the job?

This is what I love about local television stations–anything can happen. No area is safe, even mine. And when something does happen-it always makes for great ratings, guaranteed.