Ronald McDonald: Member of the Illuminati

A consumer advocacy group claims it’s time for Ronald McDonald to go, saying the nation’s largest fast-food chain’s “Chief Happiness Officer” has too much influence on kids. Yes, you read that right.

Corporate Accountability International will release a report looking at how McDonald’s uses Ronald McDonald as a marketing tool to market unhealthy products to children. The report includes information on childhood obesity rates, health and how Americans see Ronald McDonald.

McDonald’s, however, says Ronald McDonald is a “beloved brand ambassador” for the fast-food chain.

“He is the heart and soul of Ronald McDonald House Charities, which lends a helping hand to families in their time of need. Ronald also helps deliver messages to families on many important subjects such as safety, literacy, and the importance of physical activity and making balanced food choices.”

Corporate Accountability International plans to hold nearly two dozen events at McDonald’s restaurants and at colleges around the country Wednesday as it announces the contents of its report on Ronald McDonald. Events are being held in New York City, Boston, Chicago, Orlando, Greensboro, N.C., Minneapolis, San Francisco and Burlington, Vt., among other locations.

The advocacy group has also launched campaigns against bottled water and tobacco companies. So, you know, the group’s got that going for it.

The clown is dead! Long live the current clown!

Michael Polakovs, the first person to portray Ronald McDonald, died at age 86. He was originally hired in 1966 by McDonald’s to help create the character. Polakovs must have been proud to know that the clown he created made it around the world. He also probably wept deeply and often when he saw the Japanese version, though.

Speaking of Japan’s Ronald McDonald, allow me to show you just why he’s so terrifying. Hit the cut to see why. Continue reading The clown is dead! Long live the current clown!