Robots to pahk cahs in Hahvahd Yahd

“SWEET CAROLINE. BWAH. BWAH. BWAH. GOOD TIMES NEVER SEEMED SO GOOD … Error 404: rest of lyrics unintelligible.”

The Guys have been kind of banking on self-driving cars — we could use a designated driver who isn’t pregnant. But, we didn’t expect Boston to be the first city to have robot driving services. (Massachusetts didn’t even crack the Top Five drinking states, and one of them was a city.)  Nevertheless, Lyft and its partnered developer, nuTonomy, announced that they’ve started their self-driving pilot program in Bean Town.

Lyft has not yet disclosed how many robot cars will run per day, and they will only run short routes in the tech startup-heavy Seaport District. So, they’re only risking a few Segway and Hoverboard collisions and maybe, like, two drivers lost to marriage proposals. Which is smart, because we all know what could happen after the Sox lose a game.

Rise of the bad-driver machines

Robots are coming to take away your jobs, including the ones you don’t like doing but don’t want anyone else doing for you, like driving you to work. But what if it turns out the machines can’t drive any better than you?

We knew this day was coming: a self-driving car has been blamed for causing an accident. Google admitted that one of its driverless cars was at least partly responsible for hitting a bus last month. These things are so smart, but can see stealthy, streamlined vehicles like municipal buses.

The car was only going 2 mph when it hit the bus, but still, these things don’t have morals. What’s to stop a driverless car from fleeing the scene after it hits you? How do you report that to the police?