Steve Wilson, who makes his living by picking up other people’s dog poop, stuck pay turd recently.
While cleaning up after some lazy pet owner’s mutt, he found $58 packed in pure, American dog s#@t. He cleaned up the bills, put them in a (presumably) clean plastic bag and returned them to the customer.
We’d like to remind our readers that Mr. Wilson is a professional. If you or someone you know finds a lost dog turd containing money, please deposit said stool at the nearest police precinct.
Did you see what I did there? Oh my, aren’t I so clever! I’m probably the smartest person in world!
Okay, well, if I’m not, then I’m at least in the running to be smarter than a bunch of scientists from Jolly Ol’ Blighty that used a high-powered satellite to track down the fecal matter of Emperor penguins.
“This is a very exciting development. Now we know exactly where the penguins are, the next step will be to count each colony so we can get a much better picture of population size,” said penguin ecologist Phil Trathan.
Exciting development? More like crappy development, am I right guys? Huh? Huh?!