Still no cure for combovers

The Guys hate to be bearers of bad news, but know that we’re suffering about this, too.

It turns out that your hair dresser was never that into you. But, although they most definitely do not want to bang you in a barber chair (or in the shampoo station), they don’t want you to die, either.

In the last month alone, 37 percent of polled Houston hairdressers examined at least half of their customers for signs of melanoma on their face, neck and scalp.

And that other half that went uninspected? Well, that’s what happens when you don’t tip, cancer-ass.

Take it from Snee: This just ain’t healthy

So I quit smoking. No, no — please hold your applause until the end.

I’ve always been a pretty healthy guy. I work out. I don’t eat a lot of sugar, salt or arsenic. I only drink on weekends, but I always use that time productively by getting really drunk and designated driving. I don’t always use a condom when I’m treating myself to a prostitute, but I always ask if they have any on them. (If they don’t, it means they’re clean.)

So, I guess it made sense to quit smoking. I mean, why would I otherwise put in all that other effort to stay healthy?

Ah, but then I did some reading. Despite this latest endeavor, I’m still not healthy. Continue reading Take it from Snee: This just ain’t healthy