Tag: sonic

I’ll have two orders of tots and a side of meth

Hahahaha. Meth and the people who cook it always make me laugh.

Police arrived at the Cape Girardeau, Mo., Sonic drive-in, about 115 miles south of St. Louis, shortly before 2 a.m. on Thursday to discover 27-year-old Dennie L. Bratcher allegedly attempting to whip up a batch of meth in the restaurant. The shift manager, who lives in Cape Girardeau, has been charged with second-degree burglary and an attempt to manufacture a controlled substance.

Police said that Bratcher had worked the night shift and then came back after the restaurant had closed. Officers rushed to the scene when the burglar alarm was triggered and found the 27-year old inside, wearing his Sonic uniform.

“This is one of the most unusual places we’ve run into this,” Cape Girardeau police spokesman Jason Selzer told television station KFVS.

I personally look very forward to seeing Brian Huskey strung out over the new meth-flavored Sonic Blast in their next commercial.

Fighting the growing threats of animals, teenagers

If there’s one thing the Sega Genesis taught a generation, it’s that hedgehogs are speedy, blue creatures that wear only shoes and gloves–they are not toys. But what we often forget is that they are still animals, and because they are animals, they want to kill us.

Hedgehogs have spiny backs that protect them from Dr. Robotnik’s evil robots sent to destroy them. They also have powers of mind control, as a man in New Zealand found out recently. For some reason, he picked up a hedgehog, which was curled up because it was revving up to get enough speed to make it around the loop, and threw it at a teenager.

The man was charged with assault with a weapon. The teen, whose leg was injured in the attack, is fine, but the happiest news is that the hedgehog is dead.

Side note: It is with great sadness that The Guys report the death of Bryan Schools, who passed away from blog-related illness. We will miss you, Bryan. Have a drink with Jesus for us.