I’m just not as excited about the weekend this time around, everyone. Sure, it’s that un-official summer summertime and everything, but last weekend was a long weekend. In comparison, this is just a regular weekend, and studies have shown you and I will do 33% less grilling and drinking because we have to work again on Monday. Somewhere, I’ll find the motivation to write this. Blowing a call, odds are you missed it.
Analogies of the downtrodden starlets
Kristin Stewart, who apparently stars in some little-known movie series about vampires, apologized this week for comparing the paparazzi hounding her to a woman being raped. The young actress said it was an “enormous mistake” to make such a comparison of fame to a brutal and criminal act, then added that it was more like being in Rwanda during the 1994 genocide.
Mmmmm, doughnut
Today is National Doughnut Day! Did you know how iconic the doughnut is? How crucial it is to the American cuisine landscape? Me neither. This holiday was probably the work of all those doughnut manufacturer special interest groups–the same people who brought you the “doughnut hole” in Medicare Part D prescription coverage. AMIRIGHT?!
Yoo dohnt get how to spel korrectlee
I don’t need to tell you that this is a huge week for the finals. Everyone sits breathless as these fierce competitors take the stage and show us what true dedication and drive is all about. I am speaking, of course, about the Scripps National Spelling Bee finals, which take place in Washington, D.C. tonight. One group that isn’t so pleased about the bee are protesters outside the Grand Hyatt Washington, the site of the competition. They are protesting, and I am not kidding here, that words should be spelled phonetically (as they sound) and not the complicated ways they are actually spelled. This, friends, is what life in D.C. really feels like.