Tag: state of the union

Chris Matthews doesn’t remember color

After President Barack “Still Doesn’t Show Up In Spellchecker” Obama’s State of the Union Address last night, MSNBC host Chris Matthews commented on … something about the President, saying:

“I was trying to think about who he was tonight. And uh, it’s interesting. He is post-racial, by all appearances. You know, I forgot he was black tonight for an hour….”

And so we delve into another entry into Profiles in Sadness.

Let’s start with the reaction, since that’s why we’re even talking about this today: stupid people, with names like “Shoehead” and “Brent Bozell” think he was being racist.

Here’s our question: does anybody know what Chris Matthews was talking about? Is he saying he forgot about Barack Obama’s race? That Obama has wiped out race? That he sounds like a cooler-than-average white guy when Matthews close his eyes? That race ceased to exist for an hour because Obama may or may not be black until you look inside the TV, a Schrödinger’s Democrat?

We’ll take this further: does Chris Matthews know what Chris Matthews is talking about ever? Does this sound like a man who speaks with any forethought whatsoever?

  • “The on-air host was roundly criticized for calling West Point cadets ‘the enemy camp’ when Obama spoke at the U.S. Military Academy in December.”
  • “Matthews also was criticized for saying he ‘felt this thrill going up my leg’ after listening to Obama speak during the presidential primary campaign.”

And that’s the saddest part about this story. Chris Matthews doesn’t speak. MSNBC runs a fanhose to his ***hole, and cuts it on whenever it’s time for words to come out of his mouth. He’s like a perfect pitch bagpipe, as in no matter how many people like his music, damn if it isn’t both annoying and perplexing.

So, who really loses in this affair? We’re gonna go with the party with the least to say about it: MSNBC. They still have no comment.

You Missed It: Gilbert’s got a gun edition

Hello again, everyone, and welcome to 2010. I’ve been waiting here for you for quite some time. Now that I have thawed my keyboard out in this country-wide cold snap we’re having. I am now prepared to tell you what you missed this year, one week at a time. If you were busy announcing you would not run for re-election, odds are you missed it.

The NRA should take on the NBA
The Washington Wizards’ Gilbert Arenas was suspended by the NBA this week after showing a gun in his locker to a teammate. In what may have been his last game of the season, Arenas gathered the team (the Bullets) in a circle during warm-ups and shot them all with his fingers. NBA Commissioner David Stern did not enjoy the gun show.

The case in favor of sterilization
Tila Tequila, who became “famous” for her MySpace page, and then later for being an attention/ actual whore on reality television shows, might be pregnant, according to her Twitter. Should Tequila actually be pregnant, there is no word yet on how long it will take her to push the child out of her Twitter.

They’ve weaved stranger things into the plot
White House spokesman Robert Gibbs said that President Barack Obama’s State of the Union Address will not pre-empt the season premiere of Lost. He assured the legions of Lost fans that the speech will not happen on Feb. 2, the date the show is scheduled to return. In other news, this is really what our country finds important.

Tradition doesn’t always make sense

There are certain traditions every U.S. president must observe.

Every year, they have to pardon a turkey from Thanksgiving, while everyone the turkey loves gets a duck and a chicken stuffed inside of them.

They have to give a State of the Union Address, even though they are only constiutionally required to write it down. (Kinda like people who read their blogs to you.)

They have to pardon Richard Nixon at the end of their term. (Gerald Ford started that one.)

And, of course, they have to restart Mideast peace talks.