Kickstarter > ED-209

Just like in the cinematic documentary Robocop, Detroit’s government, despite everything it’s trying to do, can’t stop progress. And by progress, we mean horrific downfall based on a fictional movie.

I’m pretty sure I just contradicted the very first part of this post. Meh. How about life imitating art? Yeah, that works!

A Kickstarter program has been created by fans to fund the creation of the Robocop statue. This was finished in less than a week thanks to the Omni Consumer Products company donating 25 large to the project. No, that actually happened. Imagine a world where Eminem is replaced by a large bronze statue in commercials showing off Detroit. The only real fees would be licensing for voices! That’s it (for the most part)! Peter Weller could be at the unveiling! People could fly around on jet-packs! Bums left and right!

Oh wait, that last one’s already true.

We’d buy that for a dollar

Detroit has, for some years, struggled with it’s image … Alright, who are we kidding here? Detroit sucks.

The most iconic things to come out of it since Motown are Eminem, Kid Rock, the Lions, Home Improvement and Chrysler. The only way that list could include more failure is if a Detroit-based medical lab accidentally developed AIDS while working on a cancer cure. (For the CIA, of course.)

And there’s been no movement to fix that–not until a recent Internet poll by Mayor Dave Bing. Unfortunately, Mayor Bing has rejected your suggestion to erect a statue to Robocop.

[Special thanks to Matt Staggs.]

They belong in a museum!

The ghost of Indiana Jones can rest a little easier: artwork that the Nazis supposedly destroyed for deviancy have been found. They attempted to get rid of it by storing it in a building and then burning the whole building down, with or without the assistance of allied bombs.

The sculptures survived down in the basement after the fire and were unearthed by recent construction work. Unfortunately, any works that were made of canvas or wood probably didn’t survive. But, the statues are mostly nudes, so we’ve got that going for us.

We all need friends, even the inanimate ones

The typical Tanuki statue has several key features that represent eight good traits to have, including perception, trustworthiness, decisiveness and resolve, but in light of this recent incident, perhaps a new one should be added: companionship.

Osamu Kimura, a 41-year-old resident of Aichi prefecture, was caught trying to pilfer a ceramic Tanuki from someone’s garden. Upon conducting a search of the man’s house, police found 15 other Tanuki statues, along with various frogs and dogs, overall coming up to over 30 stolen decorative garden figures. When questioned, Kimura said that he had been lonely living alone since his father and brother passed away, and had been nicking the statues for nearly a year to, of all things, talk to.

For a country as densely inhabited as Japan, to have people so desperate for human contact as to start talking to figures seems a bit odd. Then again, perhaps that density simply exacerbates the situation, making it harder to find friends?

Oh, and one quick note: another thing that tanunkis are known for? Balls. Big, massive balls.