Oh, hello there, readers. I didn’t see you waiting there in the Internet. I have a few minutes between smoke breaks, so I’ll just answer a few of your medical questions.
Dear Dr. Snee,
Did you know that yesterday [April 19] was Clitoris Awareness Day? Did you do anything special?
Yes, I pretended that it doesn’t exist. Or is that the g-spot? I can never care. Continue reading Ask Dr. Snee: Reaching into the guynecologist’s mail sac
The Oscar nominations were announced this week, which means it’s time for the average American to pretend to care about non-explodey movies.
The one film that most people will lie about seeing when writing their “Top 2010 Movies” lists is The King’s Speech. Let’s not kid ourselves: it’s about a British king, but not one that fights battles alongside talking animals. This movie wasn’t made; it was grown in a lab to take up space in your Netflix cue.
But Miramax head, Harvey Weinstein (whose last name can’t decide how to pronounce “-ein”), has a plan: editing out the swearing to bump it down to a PG-13 or PG rating. This makes sense because the movie has seriously been hurt by the lack of grade schoolers asking their parents, “Who’s Winston Churchill?” in a crowded theater.
What might such a movie sound like, long before it reaches even basic cable? Read on for Harry, England and St. George! Continue reading Take it from Snee: The King’s Naughty Speech
If you’re in Pennsylvania, you’d better watch your language. Cops keep giving out tickets for swearing, even though it’s protected under the First Amendment. The ACLU has had enough.
It filed a lawsuit, claiming “It’s time for these dumbf#$% cops to learn the god damn laws they enforce.”
As a child, my parents had a no swearing rule. They worked hard to clean up their language, and the resulting stress caused them to flip out whenever I broke that rule.
There was one morning, though, when my dad was watching a movie with explosions, camouflage and all of my favorite words. I asked why the men in the movie were allowed to cuss, and he said, “Because they’re at war.”
Imagine the impression this would make on a 5-year-old boy. From that point, I resolved to become either a soldier or a war movie actor, just so I could say whatever I wanted. (This same logic made me want to become a bowler so I could smoke and Robocop so I could eat baby food.)
Growing up, I learned there are a few other exceptions to the no swearing rule in the general public beyond international conflict.
But is that all? Surely there are more situations where we–not just I–need to express ourselves with the lambada dance steps of communication. Continue reading Take it from Snee: We need more swearing exceptions
