Picture of stuffed anteater disqualified from photo award

There are a lot of unspoken rules in wildlife photography, like don’t swear at the animals, don’t pay the animals for their time, and no, your cats don’t count as wildlife. Another such rule is that they have to be real and alive. And one photographer lost an award for violating that one.

Britain’s Natural History Museum said it has disqualified a photo from its Wildlife Photographer of the Year award because the animal in question is dead and stuffed. The photo, taken in Brazil’s Emas National Park, depicts a large ant hill at night with an anteater coming up to feast. Turns out the anteater is a stuffed specimen usually on display at one of the park’s entrances.

Technically, it was wildlife at one point, though.

Dead bears do Knut wear plaid

Even though he's dead, Knut can still unwrap human bratwursts with his lifeless eyes, black eyes, like a doll's eyes.
Even though he’s dead, Knut can still unwrap human bratwursts with his lifeless eyes, black eyes, like a doll’s eyes.

Knut, the German polar bear, is back from the dead! His taxidermied corpse is now blocking the entrance to the Berlin natural history museum, menacing all who dare learn about trilobites, ancient arrowheads or whatever Germans dig up in their backyards. (Traces of the camps where they eliminated all of the ancient Neanderthals?)

We warned you, Germany. When Knut’s mother abandoned him, we told you he was no good. When he turned on children, we told you it was too late to put the monster back in its cage. When he became a prima donna and wouldn’t perform his two shows daily, we told you that it was time to put him on an ice flow. And now that he’s dead, we told you to leave him be.

Sometimes dead is better.

Take that, Jäger stag!

Whenever our War on Animals and Booze News coverage intersect, the results are usually tragic, though still hilarious.

Fortunately, this story has a happy ending.

And “happy ending” is a fitting description of The End of History, a limited edition beer from Scottish company BrewDog. The beer itself is 55-percent alcohol and each bottle is inside of a stuffed animal.

Not Winnie-the-Pooh-stuffed animals. Taxidermist-stuffed animals.

Unfortunately, if you hoped to snag one to toast the end of the War on Animals, you’ll have to pry it out of the cold dead hands of some beer snob collector. The £500 bottles sold out within hours.