This won’t be our first twirl around a light post, but it will be our grandest.
This is it, boozehounds! This is the day we’ve trained for! Mexico has invented
a cloud that precipitates tequila, and, brothers and sisters, The Guys are ready to sing in that rain.
Of course, there are a couple of threats to consider:
1. The border wall is no defense against Mexico’s greatest export since Taco Tuesday in aerosol form.
2. It’s being developed with the Germans.
That can’t be good.
3. It’s the greatest weather-based threat to clothes since acid rain. The aftermath of a full-on tequila storm will leave more people naked than Burning Man. And possibly result in The Purge.
But, let’s be honest: if it were up to The Guys, this is the form of our destruction that we’d choose. #zuul
If you see a difference between these drinks, you’re biased.
It’s Valentine’s Day, and whether that means you’re drinking wine with your lover, or pounding cheap whiskey mixed with tears because you’re alone, your body treats it all the same.
According to researchers, your body
can’t tell the difference between the alcohol in one drink from another. Which means if tequila makes your clothes fall off, the same amount of alcohol from hard cider will, too. The real factor is how much alcohol is in your drink, and how much alcohol is going into your system.
So don’t worry about buying the good stuff. Once it’s past your tongue, your body doesn’t know if it’s rotgut or septuple-distilled vodka.
Sooner or later, we all learn that mixing liquors is a bad idea. Sometimes it works out OK, but others it means a guarantee of waking up feeling nearly dead. Luckily, there’s a loophole: pre-mixed liquors.
Vodquila is a blend of, unsurprisingly, vodka and tequila. It was invented by a father and daughter in Alabama who apparently like to mix and drink together. They have created the perfect liquor for Mexican-Russians. They’ve even won an award for it.
Vodquila, for when you want to get tequila drunk, but with the versatility of vodka, the choice of alcoholics everywhere.
Today is St. Patrick’s Day.
I think of St. Patrick’s, I think of not pulling out during my annual night of leprechaun-themed sex. (There’s nothing I wouldn’t do for love, unlike certain Meat Loafs.)
Based on your letters, though, most of you think about drinking. Is St. Patrick’s a drinking holiday? I’ve been known tip a keg back for Bastille Day, but imbibing alcohol on a religious day? You people are weird.
Nevertheless, it is my doctorly duty to never turn away a patient until their insurance company says it’s OK. So, let’s get to your questions.
Continue reading Ask Dr. Snee: Got any Irish in you?