Better sauce, bad promotional actions

Spam. It’s just bad. Nothing about it is particularly tasty and eating it may very well make your heart explode, not necessarily because of the fat (though there is quite a bit of it in that tin), but more because of the ridiculous sodium content. Despite what the Hawaiians say, Spam shouldn’t be added to anything, especially not to pizza.

Or because of pizza. Though, that’s more spam of a different variety.

Pizza chain Papa John’s is facing a lawsuit accusing it of the very thing. Per a class-action lawsuit, the plaintiffs accuse Peyton Manning’s new endorsement contractor that an exorbitant amount of promotional text messages were sent out to them, sometimes more than 15 at a time and in rapid succession, during all hours of the day (and night). Plaintiffs are seeking 500 dollars per text, to the grand total tune of 250 million dollars. That’s a lot of pizzas that are gonna have to be sold.

Guess Peyton Manning’s not looking like as much of a futurist now, huh?

Hardcore text

Who is ur nxt VP going 2 b? IDK. LOL, but guess what? Sen. Obama is going to txt us when he chooses a running mate<3 LMAO

Translation: Modern times call for modern solutions (thank you, Dave Chappelle), and that’s why Barack Obama is going to let you know first when he chooses his running mate. Get a text from Obama himself! Standard text messaging rates and carrying fees apply.