We’re being invaded!

We’re being invaded! Size may not matter in the animal kingdom, but quantity sure as shoot does.

A town in California is being invaded by a mass of tiny toads. Unchallenged by natural predators, the population blew up exponentially. Oh sure, you might think that something the size of a quarter isn’t that bad, but wait until the end of summer when the toads are now the size of a fist.

There’s only one solution-take care of the problem now. Eradicate them all.

Winning without even trying

Some fronts take a lot of work to win. Take the Amazon rain forest for example. We know that it has the highest concentration of animal life, of both species known and unknown, in the world. To conquer such terrain is taking the coordinated effort of thousands of poor farmers looking for more land, and fast food companies who need to raise more cattle. We are making progress there slowly, but as long as we don’t give in, we will get there.

Then there are places like Yellowstone National Park, where we aren’t really trying and yet we’re winning anyway. Scientists have found that despite being protected by federal law (for reasons unknown to us) amphibians are dying off. Why? Global warming, which as any Republican leader will tell you, had nothing to do with us until this election cycle, now we believe there could be some slight human cause, but really it’s just the Earth’s natural cycle.

Scientists have found that newts, frogs and toads have been declining in population in the park. Little do they know, the amphibians are actually being used for a brew made by a witch living in the park.