We’re going to need a bigger gun.
Last week in Pompano Beach, Florida, a man was fulfilling one part of his dating profile and enjoying a long walk on the beach, when out of nowhere, he stumbled upon an eyeball. A big eyeball. A really big eyeball. And by really big, I mean a softball sized eyeball.
No one, not even science, can currently tell us the origins of said ocular organ, but it’s being studied by more scientists in St. Petersburg. Speculation is that it could be that of a tuna, a swordfish, a giant squid … or something else.
People, we can’t wait on science to figure out what this behemoth is as that could be too late. The only thing we can do is burn all of the ocean.