You Missed It: Shots fired edition

Today’s Good Friday, and I am not at work. Why is that, you ask? Because Jesus died for my long weekend. For some reason the markets are closed today, and some lucky businesses are, too. I happen to work for one of them. So, if you’re reading this at work. Don’t worry, I’m out enjoying the sunny weather. If you were busy watching water seep into your house, odds are you missed it.

Remember where you were when you first saw the video
Erykah Badu made news this week when she released a video for a song you’ve never heard of. Without permits, crew or apparent common sense, Badu and a cameraman walked through Dealey Plaza in Dallas, where JFK was shot, as she stripped (during the video, not the assassination) in front of families and oncoming traffic. Theories abound as to the message or meaning of the video. Some fans claim there was a second camera shooting from the grassy knoll.

iHype is back after a short break
The Apple hype machine was switched on again this week, but the fanboy monster was two-headed this week. First, the iPad, Apple’s high tech take on the cafeteria lunch tray, is nearing its release date, and there aren’t enough to go around. Secondly, rumors circulated that a new iPhone could be released this year that would work on non-AT&T networks, like Verizon. With this site having a white background, all we need is some happy music and snarky tagline at the end and we’ve got an Apple commercial.

Who even knew they were married?
We found out that Sandra Bullock definitely wants a divorce from noted motorcycle person and tattoo enthusiast Jesse James because of alleged affairs with several women. We’re not talking Tiger’s numbers, but it’s up there. Also, he might like Hitler. With all of these Hollywood people sleeping around with random skanks in the same area, you have to wonder if there’s an overlap on clientele.

Pets continue to mooch

We all know pets require a lot of time, care, attention, maintenance and in some cases, poop scooping. But the times are changing, and so are pets’ needs. One sign of this is that dogs now require cell phones, but you get stuck with the bill when they cannot pay it (they don’t have jobs, of course).

A collection agency sent Andy Fanelli, a fluffy white dog of some sort in California, a bill for $142.34 for Verizon Online. The lazy dog apparently has had a cell phone somewhere and is sticking it to is owners. This is why you can’t get attached to pets, because you may one day have to put them down.

(Via Consumerist)