Bumper stickers: they may be the only clues we have about our fellow drivers. It dawned on me that people put these on their vehicles explicitly to tell us about themselves and their wonderful children and whatnot.
I mean, sure, you think you’re just proud to have a kid in Cub Scouts. But how would, say, a pedophile scout leader read that? (Braggadocio, most likely.)
What they don’t realize, though, is that their bumper stickers may say things they never intended. As a service to you, I have decoded popular ones so that you may avoid embarrassment or even roadside homicide.
Translation: I haven’t achieved anything since I was on the honor roll in elementary school. It must be a family trait!
Side Note:
Considering that there are school districts that ban Tag and Dodge Ball because they hurt self-esteem, how are there still honor roll stickers? What about the students who didn’t make the honor roll?Sure, they probably can’t read anyway, but doesn’t this sticker exclude them and–more importantly–their parents?
Or do they put every kid in school on the honor roll now?
Translation: Please don’t break into and/or steal my car.
Translation: Rush was against him before he was for him, and so was/am I!
Translation: I don’t care that my indie candidate sold out to go mainstream.
Translation: Mommy and Daddy bought me this Volkswagen when I distinctly asked them for a BMW.
Translation: Go ahead and pull this car over, Officer. I guarantee that I’ve not not been drinking.
Translation:
(This one’s a doozy … )
1) I have a very limited grasp of how laws are made and enforced and honestly believe that this barely visible sticker will stop police officers from pulling me over for breaking the law.
2) I also forgot that I already supported the state police this year when I paid my taxes.
3) I most likely give my credit card number away on the phone.
Translation: For some reason, I think you give a rat’s ass about my choice of religion.
Translation: For some reason, I think you give a rat’s ass about my disdain of your choice of religion.
Translation: Yep, I guess I did give a rat’s ass about your disdain of my choice of religion.
Translation: I keep using this word, “irony,” yet I have no idea what it means.
Translation: Woah woah woah! Didn’t you see my Obama sticker? Put my Blaupunkt back!
from the jesus fish to calvin, you had me lol irl.
ya rly!
well Rick as your future aunt “I approve of this article”