Surprisingly enough, PETA is at it again. We’ve told you about their plans to unleash a preachy porn site on the world, as well as their attempts to justify a kid getting attacked by a shark in Florida. But now they’re going after someone so cute and loved the world around that one has to wonder how a human could ever levy an attack like this.
They’re going after Mario, as in Super Mario. You know, the video game character who has existed for about 30 years and angered exactly no one except King Bowser in that time? Yeah, him, probably his brother, too. The problem that PETA has with Mario is that aside from dating a chick who keeps getting herself kidnapped, he’s wearing a tanooki suit, known to fans of Super Mario Bros. 3 as the suit where you could fly and turn into a statue (not at the same time).
They’re trying to sink Mario’s newest game, which includes the suit, effectively making them Wario or something.
Sure, the suit was one of a few in Super Mario Bros. 3 that made Mario look like a furry, but it was a pretty cool power-up, and one that we have not seen since. We’ve seen the return of many favorites like the mushroom that makes you big, and the flower that allows you to spit fire (of course it does), but the suit, and its counterpart, the leaf that gave you ears and a tail, also allowing you to fly went by the wayside. Why these things allowed flight has never made sense. Personally, I just chalked it up to Japanese culture and moved on.
But now that it’s back, the people (if you can call them that) at PETA want to make sure you know that killing and gutting an animal, only to wear its entire skin as a suit, is morally wrong, and it won’t allow you to fly, either. That’s why these entirely-sane folks have staged a protest, through their own video game. In “Super Tanooki Skin 2D,” you’re a skinned tanooki, and you’re not happy about it. So you chase after Mario, trying to get your fur back, and I’m guessing get some preachy 16-bit messages along the way. Sounds like a hit!
Let’s keep in mind that for three decades, Mario Mario, and his brother, Luigi Mario, have been blazing new trails in Italian stereotypes. Not only are they plumbers with big mustaches, but they (in newer games) even have the accent going, too. They’ve also been killing turtles, fish, squid and goombas (racial slur and probably an endangered species by now) the whole time. They’ve also put on other animal costumes, but this one, this suit, is apparently too much for PETA.
PETA, the Japanese really don’t care about your cause, these are the people who kill whales illegally in the name of “science,” and let’s face it, your circles and gamer circles really don’t meet very often. Just the same, if I were you guys, I’d be looking over my shoulder for a fireball coming my way.