You may have noticed, but right now, it’s not really a good time to be a celebrity. That is of course if you like being alive. David Carradine, Ed McMahon, Farrah Fawcett and Michael Jackson (not to mention Billy Mays and some actors who hadn’t worked in 20 years, but let’s stick with the big ones).
Celebrities seem to be kicking the oxygen habit left and right, and this is generally a bad career move. Some can take this as a strange coincidence, but I don’t believe in coincidences (ever notice how Tuesday always follows Monday? Why is that?). Clearly, there is something behind all the celebrity deaths, and I think I know just what it is.
We have too many damn famous people and its time to cull the herd. You see, media moves faster today than it did in a month just 10 years ago, and the entertainment industry tries its best to keep up. This means that we get tired of people faster and faster. After all, you can only watch someone’s star rise so far before you’re ready to see it come crashing back to Earth in a crazy, often drug-fueled, plunge.
Part of the problem is that we have people who are famous for doing very little that a sane society would find useful or worthy of money. Instead, these people, who are often very rich and into themselves, talk at great length about how hard their lives are and how they just wish they could be happy for a day. These people sit around and whine for our entertainment. I am speaking of course about earthworms reality TV stars.
It’s one thing to watch people you once found interesting and talented clutch to whatever fame they have left as they go through their daily life. I’ll even give you the option of watching them decide which of the skanks competing for their affection they wish to bed that evening. But I just can’t see the appeal of watching people who are either rich, crazy or both try to convince me that I should care about them simply because they can talk about their feelings to a camera.
I choose to sit here and type my feelings, then broadcast them to the world, on a weekly basis. Some people find it entertaining. I think I just got a great pitch for a new show.