Vodka: cleaner laundry AND body

Vodka saved a poisoned Australian man’s life after he drank anti-freeze.

This is yet another miracle attributed to vodka, that colorless lifejuice from Russia. Other miracles include (but are apparently not limited to):

  • Removing cigarette stink from laundry.
  • Mixing well with any non-alcoholic beverage known to humanity.
  • Making work bearable.
  • Dean Martin’s career without Jerry Lewis.
  • Making vermouth–and now anti-freeze–consumable.

Is it possible for the Vatican to beatify a beverage? It beats the hell (heh) out of red wine/BoC.