Folks, smoke ’em if you got ’em, it’s celebrating time.
Fidel Castro, the once-fearsome leader of communist Cuba, has declared that communism no longer works. Like it ever did. We’re serious here, Castro said the Cuban form of communism doesn’t work anymore. Basically, that means we won the embargo. Eat it, commies!
Remember this day, proud Americans. This is a day such as we have not seen since the fall of the Berlin Wall, and Pepsi’s not there to exploit it this time (yet). Any day now, they Cuban government is going to ask the U.S. Army to take a symbolic run up San Juan Hill and plant the American flag. Rum and cigars for everyone!
If you get a chance, check out Goldberg’s blog on the Atlantic. His conversations with Castro play out like a Vonnegut novel, “Cat’s Cradle” in particular.
The revelation in this article takes place just before Fidel takes Jeffrey to a dolphin show. (Worst. Children’s book/porno. Ever.)