As a kid, I never really got why Good Friday was such a big deal. Sure, Jesus was crucified and all, but why celebrate somebody dying? It wasn’t until I got older that I realized that Jesus was Irish, and Good Friday celebrations are just a typical Irish wake, complete with celebrations and drinking (around my place, anyway).Now I just need to figure out why the stock markets are closed today. If you were busy getting ready for your big wedding this week, odds are you missed it.
Joining the 200-mile-high club
Admit it, you’ve thought about it. Right after the “How do they go to the bathroom in space?” question was answered, you were wondering whether astronauts get it on up there. NASA has denied it ever happening, and this week a Russian expert said cosmonauts never have, either. In related news, Pope Benedict XVI may call the International Space Station when Space Shuttle Endeavour is docked with it. He’s probably calling to remind the astronauts that masturbation is a sin.
The colors were just, like, beautiful, man
Hey everybody, remember that big oil spill in the Gulf of Mexico last year (you may have heard about it)? Well, the explosion on the Deepwater Horizon rig that caused it and killed 11 people, was a year ago this week, April 20, to be exact. The good news is that the hippies were too busy smoking weed to mark the solemn occasion.
It matters not if you are black or white
A California judge ruled that the jury in the wrongful death suit brought against Michael Jackson’s doctor can view two autopsy photos Jackson, one clothed, and one not. So get ready, women in 1986, those nude pictures you’ve been waiting for are nearly yours!