So um, hey, how about those baseball playoffs? How is your favorite team faring in them? Really? That’s awesome/too bad, there is so much baseball left/always next year. And how about the local NFL team, huh? Man, they are doing really well/terribly/unspeakable things that end up getting them suspended for the first four games of the season. This weekend when you’re out at a bar, that’s how you strike up a conversation with the guy drinking whiskey neat staring at the television. If you were busy givin’ speak peeks of your new show fishin’ an’ kayakin’ and snow-machinin’, odds are you missed it.
Rise of the mole people
Christmas came early this year for Chile, after the 33 trapped miners who were told they would not be rescued until the holidays, were brought safely to the surface this week after 69 days trapped underground. In an interview with The Washington Post, Richard Villaroel, one of the rescued miners, said the only way they talked about cannibalism was in joking terms. We imagine it went something like this: “Hey! Hey Eduardo! You’re looking pretty skinny there, jefe! *snort* You’d better gain some weight, because when you die down here without ever seeing sunlight again, we are going to eat you! Get it?”
And he’s about 30 years too old to be wearing Crocs
Minnesota Vikings quarterback and noted senior citizen Brett Favre finds himself in hot water after naked pictures, allegedly sent to women not his wife, surfaced. No this isn’t like a couple years ago when Washington Redskins running back Chris Cooley accidentally included his dong in a picture he posted on his blog (really). For the record, even little Favre wears a purple helmet.
Now he’s got rubber to burn
Pastor Terry “14 Minutes and Counting” Jones made big news a month ago when he didn’t burn the Koran like he said he was going to. As a reward for not doing the dumb thing he planned to do, which is the whole reason he is a known name anyway, a New Jersey car dealer is awarding Jones a car. The joke’s on the pastor, however: it’s only a Hyundai Accent.