How fat is baby? Soooo fat

It looks like even babies are starting to let themselves go, according to Dr. John Harrington.

Dr. Harrington has just released research of obese children’s  medical records that were gathered by himself and colleagues. They started gaining weight as infants, and 50 percent were overweight by age 2, and 90 percent by 5.

So, parents, if you want to reach your kids before they really pork out, maybe you should scatter some magazines around the house with idealized skinny kids. And make sure to add some passive-aggressive digs like, “Are you sure you want stringed cheese?” and, “It’s amazing how much bigger they make diapers these days.”

Hey, we write the ‘How Tos!’

Once again, another “recognized” media outlet is cramping our style. This time, it’s long-time reader/often linking to us CNN.

Look at their site today, and what do you find? “How to keep your kids pain-free.”

This work of outright theft is a numbered list of steps in bold font, followed by a paragraph or three of regular-font details.

Here’s an example from their “own” Web site:

5. Don’t be afraid of opiates

Opiates can help a child in severe pain, and the risks are small, pediatric pain experts say.

The sad part is, not only did they steal one of our featureswhich also runs on Thursdays — but they did it wrong.

You don’t make your kids pain-free with pinwheels and drugs; you burn all their nerves off at an early age before memories last. Think of it as a follow-up procedure to a circumcision or ear-piercing.