Day: May 3, 2011

Eat My Sports: Draft dodger

I’ve done my best not to touch on the NFL lockout and the potential loss of part of the season or perhaps an entire year. But with the lockout approaching two months, it’s a hard thing to ignore, and what’s becoming even more evident is the source of the issue, Roger Goodell.

Goodell started his rule as commissioner as a business savvy handoff from the immensely popular Paul Tagliabue. Then the iron fist started coming down, you can’t hit Tom Brady, defenseless receivers, blah, blah, blah, Goodell quickly started removing parts of the game that had been in place for years so people don’t get hit. Why? Because Goodell doesn’t view this as football, he doesn’t care about the players or what the NFL means to the average American who puts their hard earned money into these franchises. No, it’s never been about football, this is Roger Goodell’s corporation, and he’s ruining a game we love. Continue reading Eat My Sports: Draft dodger

That’s what it typed

Let’s cut the crap, sit down and have a nice conversation, Science. I’ll be honest with you: you’ve got me a little worried here and there. See, I don’t really know what to think of you. I mean, sometimes you’re useful, but most of the time, you’re not, what with your beakers and Tesla coils and multi-colored liquids. And that’s not even counting the number of times that you’ve tried to sell us out to the robots! Oh, sure, some of the times may have been unwittingly, but not all of the times. So really, why should we trust you? Why not just go back to dirt and rocks?

Because, as always, sometimes you make it all worthwhile. Forget the harsh words! I’ll take you back with open arms! We’ll be together forever and I’ll never let you go. No matter what, I want you, in the end.

That’s what she said.

Which came first?

New Jersey is probably not the sort of place you would go to pick up chicks, but one town there actually wants to control how many chicks there are.

In what is being hailed as a revolutionary effort to defeat our chicken foes, the township of Hopewell, N.J. recently adopted an ordinance on when chickens and roosters can get it on and how many hens you can have in a backyard hen house.

The problem, we’re assuming, is not that chickens aren’t tasty and go well with just about any side dish with a white wine, it’s that they are kind of disease-ridden when they aren’t dead, and the roosters can get a bit loud. Good move, Hopewell, population control is the only way to take these earthbound birds down a notch!